Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Year 47, nope still not brave enough

I can't hang my leg off the bed.  I just can't do it.  Not even a little.  I know that something is going to touch it, grab it, eat it, rip it off, or lick it.

Just last night I tried.  What is wrong with me?  I have 2 dogs in the room that I am certain if someone corporeal or otherwise were in there they would alert me. Hell I have another dog just down the hall who barks even when nothing is there. I laid there at 4 in the morning talking aloud to myself about how it was fine.  I can do this I said.  Nothing is here.  It will be fine.  I get up in 2 hours.  Finally after 10 minutes I said fuck it and put my leg back on the bed.

I will try again next year.  I need to have something to look forward as a challenge besides the easy things like kids graduating, marriage and grandchildren, right?!  Irrational fear is so much fun.