Such an emotional weenie

I already know I can't go to live theater where emotion is involved.  Yes I am the one who stood up during Miss Saigon and yelled Noooooooooo! when she killed herself and the one sobbing uncontrollably during An Almost Holy Picture when she tried to shave off all her hair.  

Now it's movies. There have been several movies lately where the story was really emotional or someone has died or been killed and I just wasn't ready for it. It's a good thing it's dark in a theater.  I now at least take Kleenex and can keep my sobbing more quiet. Even when I see it coming. It doesn't matter if it's fairy tales or scifi. 

I used to try to be cool about it, now I don't care. I just try to keep the nose blowing to a minimum. If the director is trying to figure out if the movie will elicit this kind of feeling, s/he really ought to have me in the focus group.

Today was Star Wars -The Force Awakens.  Friggin' JJ Abrams. Had to go and do that. I have known these characters 38 years. The only thing that made me chuckle a bit in my tears what the fact that the Kylo Ren actor was just the youngest brother in This Is Where I Leave You. He was such an idiot in that movie. 

With more Marvel movies coming out soon I need to find a way to recover quickly. Maybe I should experiment with a movie stress ball.

Stroke of Luck

A week ago I had a TIA, a tiny stroke.  I was eating dinner with my husband and youngest daughter when out of nowhere I was talking jibberish. I knew what I was trying to say, but it wasn't coming out right. The harder I tried, the harder it was to say anything. Then my words were just gone. It only lasted about an hour, but the fear factor was incredible. Away to the hospital we went, where after a CT they promptly announced I had a stroke. I just started to cry. 

My neurologist found this all quite a mystery. I just don't have the risk factors. He said I was very lucky and that this is a warning. Okay, I'm listening! 

I know the event was scary for me but it was almost more so for my family. I think my daughter and I have a stronger relationship now. Much to my chagrin she knows I am human after all. If I had any doubt how much my husband loves me after all these years, that is gone. The fear in his eyes when he knew he could not protect me was overwhelming to me. I am not the most lovable person, but by God my family showed me how much they love me. I am very blessed and very lucky. Maybe in some weird way this was the only way to deliver a message to me. Don't be so hard on yourself. You don't have to be superwoman, we love you unconditionally. 

The one thing that hurts me is that I missed my middle daughter's graduation from graduate school. I know how disappointed she was. I wish I could fix that. 

I am thankful for my family and friends. I love the texts asking me how I feel today and the daily phone calls. As much as I am thankful for the outpouring of love, I hope this doesn't happen again. 

At least I kept my sense of humor...

It did not fall out

It was a pretty common occurrence for my mother to question the whereabouts of my brain as a teenager and well okay, til I was about 40. 

Shelley Ann, did your brain fall out of your head?

What the hell kind of decision was that, is there anything in there (knocking on my head)?

If I look in this ear I will probably see your dad on the other side because there can't be anything in that head of yours!

Well, I am here to tell you that my brain is indeed in my head. You know how I know?  Because I just had a neck MRI and lo and behold you can see every bit of my beautiful brain in there.

It's in every damn image. 

So as for those all those situations I got into and all those decisions with which you disagreed? That was just plain stupidity. 

Just rip it off

So my month long stay in Italy was cut short.  Have you ever had a pinched nerve?  Let me describe it:

Take a dozen forks and keep poking your neck and shoulder with them, hard, then

Take your left arm and tell someone to twist it just until you think it will rip apart and have him just hold it there, then

You only know your left hand is there because you can see it and touch it , but it has no feeling and you are still apologizing to the guy that you spilled tomato juice on on the airplane from Amsterdam to Atlanta cuz you forgot you couldn't feel your hand when you reached to take the drink from the stewardess, then

Just to make it interesting have absolutely no meds that make it feel better and you can't get into a neurologist in the Indy and surrounding area until Aug 4th. 

Thanks to BCD travel for getting me out of Italy within hours of being cursed with this wonderful event.

And finally after 3 weeks abroad I have these things to be thankful for in the great USA:

English

Salad Dressing

Ketchup

Mustard

Any other food than Italian

AIR CONDITIONING 

 

God Bless the USA and if you haven't chosen a profession, please be a neurologist because clearly there aren't enough of them!

Playing nine pin

As the summer storms roll by this evening I am taken back in my memory by the thunder. Back to when I was a child and loved to learn about and read fables, folklore, and fairy tales.  One in particular stored itself deep in my brain and was awakened today after slumbering for many years.  

Don't worry my dear, don't let that thunder frighten you. It is only Henry Hudson playing nine pin in the mountains... Indeed it is.  I am not afraid.

http://americanfolklore.net/folklore/2010/07/henry_hudson_and_the_catskill.html

It's alive!!!!

Funny how a thing like assuring a butterfly makes it into the wild makes you feel like a champion. 

I bought this little dude last weekend at a farmer's market.  Today was the magical day that it emerged from it's chrysalis and was ready for the world.

Fly, be free! Live a wonderful life!  

Today is a very good day!

An old soul

I have always loved talking to older people. When I was a kid I would spend more time with adults than kids, especially when I was a teenager. I was always at my Uncle Hank's, the Falbos, or my Aunt Thelma's. I never had a problem talking to them. It was easy. I think that's why I didn't develop a lot of friends my age. I didn't know how to behave with them or act like them. 

It's kind of funny because even now when I meet older folks just about anywhere they usually strike up a conversation or I do and it's a good time. 

Now that I'm almost 50 I seem to be growing into myself.  Some of us are slower getting there than others.  I am really enjoying my life now.  I feel now like I did when I was with them - at peace, at ease, loving me for who I am.

I am so glad to have shaken off the BS from just a couple of years ago. I love everything I have and I am thankful for it.